Beginnings (YIKES)

 

I have been wanting to blog for, well, for as long as there have been “blogs,” but always talked myself out of it because who would want to read what I write anyway?  Seriously, this is big stuff, this blogging world.  What makes me think I have something worthwhile to say, something to blog?  I have so much going on in my head, one thought after another.  Many times I have to literally, consciously, tell myself to stop.  STOP THINKING!!!  It can be exhausting. I analyze, over analyze, everything.  Right now I am thinking that I am rambling and need to stop.  I am also thinking that maybe I just need to pick a topic and go with that on each blog post.  Yes, I think that is a good idea because otherwise…well, you can see what happens.

So today, the first day of 2012, my first day of stepping into the world of blogging, I will  tell you a little bit about myself. That will be my topic….me.   I have been many things in my life but I like who I am today best.  So, I’ll just go with that, for now.  This is how I define myself today at 53, I am: a Christian, a wife, a mother and a step-mother, a soon to be grandmother, a sister, up until September 16^th a daughter, a photographer and maybe, just maybe, a blogger. 

I have always needed to write.  I wrote stories and journaled for as long as I can remember; the difference between then and now is that I never shared what I wrote.  I guarded every word, afraid that if anyone read the thoughts that I put down into words, I would be found out. Sometimes my thoughts aren’t pretty and I’m insecure enough to want everyone to like me and think I have it all together. (Why do we do that to ourselves?) If you read some of my journal entries, you would know that sometimes I’m downright crazy!  I am not sure how, why, or what happened, but I have felt a push to be open, to share, so I began doing just that.  I started by sharing some of my writing with friends, I wrote my fathers graveside service and actually read it in front of family and friends, and I even had a poem published recently in “A New Song”.   I am proud of that, even though it makes me feel really vulnerable.  I am beginning to believe that vulnerability is not a terrible thing. 

I also want a venue to share my photography.  Photography has consumed me for the last couple years.  It has always been an interest but within the last five years, it started to become an obsession.  About two years ago, I started LMB Photography (www.lynnmburgherphoto.com) and am ecstatic with where it has gone.  Within the next couple years, I am hoping to build a studio/office right in my back yard.  I am so excited about this, I can hardly contain myself.  It is only in the thought stage and was actually my husband’s idea.  He just happened to mention something about maybe……and I started running with the idea.  Because his job has us living mostly in Indiana, I know that this may take longer than I want it to but it is a dream nonetheless, and something to look forward to.  We all need that.  We all need dreams. We all need to have something to look forward to.

 I used to love the song Anticipation….”We can never know about the days to come, but we think about them anyway”.  I think anticipation is a really good thing. I’m not saying I live for the future but I do anticipate.  So, for 2012, I am looking forward to many things but the two I am thinking about today is the February arrival of a beautiful and healthy grandchild, and my business, LMB Photography, to grow.

I think this may be way too long of a post.  Are there rules? ;-)

Oh, one more thing, I really don’t know a lot about grammar so forgive me, please…or should that be please forgive me??  (Grammar and spell check said I was ok, so I am feeling ok…but, I know they can’t find everything….ok, done.)